Thursday, February 25, 2010

Happy Friday Quote...

Happiness keeps You Sweet,
The IRS keeps you broke.
Trials keep You Strong,
Sorrows keep You Human,
Failures keep You Humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
But Only Buddies keep You Going!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

It's a New Day...

And that means New Beginnings!

I went on strike in my house! I am tired of being over worked, taken advantage of, walked on, used, and not enjoying life anymore. I bend over backwards to get everyone where they need to go, schedule everything, meetings, appts., school, church, doctors, homework, errands, sports, take me here, i need this....ENOUGH!!!

For the last 6 months, I have been the doormat and chaueffer. I have been the maid, the cook, the laundrymat, personal shopper and nurse. Not one Thank You. Not one "I appreciate you". Not one smile. Not one hug. Not anything!

And then it all blows up and guess who's fault it is??? Yep! They all blamed me!

So guess what? I quit!

I can't go to your appts for you. I can't go to school for you. I can't play the sport for you. I can't live your life for you. I can't live MY life because I'm living as your servant. And no one is happy. Especially ME! And when Mama's not happy, ain't no one happy.

So Monday night I let them have it. I threw in the towel. They were scared. They looked very scared. They've never seen Mom like this. What does this mean? Are you telling me I had the good life and now it's gone? Yep...that's what it means!

I told them my job was to provide Housing, clothes and food. That's it! And from now on that was all they were going to get!

Yesterday, I did the laundry (clean clothes), I worked my job (to pay for housing) and I cooked dinner (food). That's all! I was VERY quiet all day. Didn't talk to anyone. Didn't chit chat. Didn't answer questions to me (I'm making a point). And I didn't check on homework. And at 8pm last night my son freaked out because he forgot to do his homework and "why didn't you remind me?" came out of his mouth! And I smiled. My plan is working.

After school yesterday, my son was bothered with my quietness. So he tested the waters. Asked me questions. He started out simple and when those didn't get answered, he upped the anty. But still nothing! He was very scared. Next thing I know...he's bringing up the folded laundry and putting every ones away. Then I hear the Vacuum, downstairs and the upstairs. Then I hear him cleaning his sisters room (which was a mess after having a sleep over this weekend). Then I hear dishes being done.

He kept letting me know after each job was done what he had done. I guess he thought he deserved a pat on the back or a checklist being marked off. Mom didn't get a pat on the back or her list checked off. They just kept adding to it. plan is working.

Hubby is on that lists too. He stayed clear of me last night. And he snuck out the door to work this morning.

I don't know how long I will keep this up. I usually cave in before them. I can't stand not helping them out. But I feel much better today. Woke up and it's a new day, and that means a new beginning. Amen!


Tuesday, February 23, 2010

What a night...

So last night was either one of the worst nights ever or it will turn out to be one of the best in the long run. Either way - I'm done! Throwing in the towel. Thought this was very appropriate for the mood...

One Flaw In Women
Women have strengths that amaze men.....
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Thought for the day...

"Do not lose your inward peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset. You must pause your movements and be silent within your self, you will then...have the peace to begin again the way to your chosen path."

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Ash Wednesday...

So we went to church last night for Ash Wednesday. Our son sat with his confirmation class, so it was just us and our daughter and my 5 yr old nephew. Just as the Mass was about to start, an elderly lady sat behind us who must have just spritzed herself with perfume on her way to church. When Emily blurts out "Ew mom, what is that smell? It stinks in here" and to make matters worse she starts dramatically fanning the air around her and making a gagging sound.

*I wanted to crawl under the bench and die right there*

Then as we get to the communion part, my nephew tells Emily that it's time for the "wafer". Emily looks at me and says loudly as the Mass pauses for silence, "Mom, I'm not eating that. What is it, Bread? A Cookie? That looks gross!"

*Lightening strike me NOW*

Then the priest is blessing the wine and my nephew looks at me and says "Why does he get soda at church?"

*Anytime now Lightening*

For some reason they did not have the air conditioning on and it was packed inside for the special service. And it got very hot in there with so many bodies. Emily and my Nephew start fanning themselves in the air and whispering loudly "oh I'm so hot, I think I have to sit down and not listen anymore".

God, Please forgive the young ones...they do not know the ways yet. *sigh*


Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Dedicated to my daughter...

Heaven’s Very Special Child
By: Edna Massimilla

A meeting was held quite far from earth.
It was time again for another birth.
Said the Angels to the Lord above –
“This special child will need much love.
“Her progress may be very slow,
“Accomplishments she may not show.
“And she’ll require extra care
“From the folks she meets down there.
“She may not run or laugh or play,
“Her thoughts may seem quite far away.
“So many times she will be labeled
‘different,’ ‘helpless’ and ‘disabled.’
“So, let’s be careful where she’s sent.
“We want her life to be content.
“Please, Lord, find the parents who
“Will do a special job for you.
“They will not realize right away
“The leading role they are asked to play.
“But with this child sent from above
“Comes stronger faith, and richer love.
“And soon they’ll know the privilege given
“In caring for their gift from heaven.
“Their precious charge, so meek and mild
“Is heaven’s very special child.”

I Love you very much baby girl...

Monday, February 15, 2010

Dance Recital Part 2

This is the "Ballet" portion of Emily's Dance.

Please tell me she is not picking her nose?

Doing Good Emily!
You show Them!

And to think we were told when she was a baby that she may never walk or talk and would never be "Normal"...Just look at her now and you know why she is my Hero!


Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Dance Recital part 1...

So Emily's dance class is a two parter. She takes Tap Dance and Ballet in a combo class. So they spend part of it doing Tap and then switch to Ballet. It really just teaches them the basics, no big dance combo steps that will put them on broadway, but it's a great way for someone to test the waters in both and see if they like it.
Emily loved the classes at the first part of the semester. But as time wore on, she quickly tired. So I am proud that she finished it. You can see she is mostly following other students or the teacher, but she's doing it to the best of her ability! And with her mental slowness, it's AMAZING!
That's suppose to be clouds around them...

It was during these recitals dances that DH informed me that the disc he brought for the Video Camera was used up on the gymnastics part and he had no more left to record for the dance. So after saying a few choice words under my breathe to DH about how was I too take Pics to scrapbook if I have to video record with my still shot camera??? I then quickly switched camera settings through all the shows and missed enjoying the moment itself. *ugh* If you want something done it yourself!


Disclaimer: I have tried for 8 hours now to upload video and Blogger is not cooperating. So I am sorry...there is no video to view!

Emily's final performance...

So Emily had her dance recital and Gymnastic performance last month, but i'm just getting around to getting the pictures off the camera and able to post some.

Yes, she is the tallest girl in class and being skinny doesn't help the tallness make her stick out even more. LOL
But she had a good time. So here are some pics and if I can get the video downloaded...there will be video too!
After the performance, then they had free time to show us what they had learned. Emily showed us her stretching and balance beam.

She was showing Dad how she can do it by herself.

Tomorrow I'll post her Dance...


Sunday, February 7, 2010

Comment Verification...

I'm sorry fellow Bloggers...But I have to enable the word verification and comment moderator because I am getting a lot of spam comments in the last two weeks. And it's driving me crazy! Bare with me please...


Thursday, February 4, 2010

High School Reunion...

I am sitting here watching High School reunion on TV and wondering about real life. Have you seen the show? They take 10 people from a class back in the 1980's and stick them in Hawaii in one house. They take one from each class of people or cliques. A nerd, a jock, a bully, a cheerleader, etc. and they spend two weeks together going on dates and confronting each other on things from the past.

It's kinda funny to watch how pathetic some people are. They just can't let go of their high school years. But it also is sad to see the heartbreak as they confront their bullies or fears and try to move on.

If you think about your school years, High School stands out more then say your elementary years do. High School had the most memories. First love, first BFF's, first freedom, first date, first formal dance, first driver license, first car, first kiss, first sexual experience for some. Depending on your High School years, it made or break you.

I think my HS years, were by far the best ones. I finally felt comfortable with who i was, I let myself enjoy life and made some great friends and memories along the way.

It does break my heart to see some people who have never been able to let go of those years. Who still thrive to be the center of attention. Or can't let go of a lost love. The boy who longs to be the class clown in a business meeting, or the girl who longs to be with her quarterback boyfriend. They can not move on and live their lives fully while they still live in the past. They are missing out on this life that was given to them.

I hope they find peace. I hope they come to accept themselves for who they are now, and not who they were then.


Wednesday, February 3, 2010

I'm in a Funk...

It's true. I have been in a funk for a few weeks now. Winter Blues? Not enough sleep? Depressed? Stressed? Worn out? You name it, I probably have it. I haven't blogged much lately because I don't want my crappy mood to rub off on you kind folks. And I really have been far-fetched to find something positive to talk about. So I stay quiet.

I have the baby blues. I know, I know...I am way past the baby making stage. And no worries, DH had that snipped the second our last was born so I could not have these feelings and talk him into it. Because let me tell you, had he not I would SOOOOO be workin that whole angle on him. My babies are 13 & 9, and yes it's nice having them beyond the baby/toddler stage and independent, I miss the baby stage. I miss the smells, the unconditional love, the holding and staring forever at them, the showing off, the "i can't believe i made this person" feeling.

I have the "I'm sick of my life can I run away to a tropical place and never come back?" blues. So really, can I? Would that make me a bad mom? I'll even take them with me?

I have the ever eternal tiredness that never leaves no matter how much sleep i manage during the day. It makes it really hard to motivate myself to go to work. To do laundry. To put on make-up.

I am eating junk again. Haven't been to the gym in so long I don't want to tell you because I'm ashamed. That 6lbs I lost? ya, it's back. The Holidays happened, Arizona happened, life happened. I can't seem to motivate myself to get back. And it's been raining for like 40 days and nights now, so I can't walk with my BFF who would show up at my house every morning and kick me in the butt and stand over me while i grudgingly put my shoes on and she shoved me out the door and on to our 2-3 mile walks each morning. Is it weird I miss that from her? Hmm...that's another post someday.

So the good thing is that I consciously know I am doing all these things. And I am telling myself to pull it together and move on. And then that little voice in my head says "there's always tomorrow"...